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Conflict Avoidance In Relationships: What Is It And Why Does It Happen?

Avoiding conflict in relationships can be a result of irrational thinking patterns. For example, you may believe that conflict will immediately lead to a breakup or that you do not have a right to express yourself. If you’re struggling with fear of confrontation, you do not have to suffer in silence. Opening up to your partner and being vulnerable can increase your intimacy and develop a stronger sense of understanding between the two of you. Conflict can become extremely overwhelming for some people, so they avoid it altogether.

Practice setting boundaries

You could even ask if your partner would consider inviting you to the events they are going to. As long as you and your partner are committed to bettering the relationship and communicating with one another with respect, there is nearly always a path forward. I’ll teach you simple, actionable tools and strategies that you can use today to make your relationship the best it’s ever been.

List what you can learn from how to overcome conflict avoidance

Research shows that these principles effectively improve marital satisfaction and reduce marriage problems. While it’s OK to never be completely comfortable with confrontation, being able to resolve issues effectively means accepting how to deal with someone who avoids conflict it as a healthy part of communicating with others. Disagreeing with someone doesn’t necessarily mean “fighting.” Keep in mind that it’s not about blaming the other person or proving who’s right and wrong in a given situation.

Resolve issues in real-time

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Conflict avoidance is a type of people-pleasing behavior that typically arises from a deep rooted fear of upsetting others. Instead of yelling at your partner that they don’t love you any more or that they are a bad person for not spending more time with you, focus on how you are feeling. Developing a better understanding of why you are hesitant to bring up an issue within your relationship may help you better express yourself to your partner, leading to more impactful conversations. A 2011 research study found that high conflict avoidance in a relationship will likely cause relationship dissatisfaction for women, but not necessarily for men.

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

You can also prevent conflict by becoming more aware of your emotions and the emotions of other people. For example, being raised by high-conflict parents or cruel and abusive family members can at times result in developmental trauma or even post-traumatic stress disorder. Some of the many symptoms my clients face include depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and chronic feelings of guilt.

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Recognize that it doesn’t have to be a fight

Avoiding Conflict Altogether

  • Have you ever wondered to yourself, “What if I’m not in love with my partner anymore?
  • Finally, thank the other person for their time and effort, summarizing what you agreed upon, expressing appreciation, and hoping for a stronger relationship and a bright future.
  • However, there are things you can do to effectively deal with HCPs.
  • We’ve all been there—That moment when you feel a conflict brewing and your stomach starts to churn.
  • A lot of the research shows that conflict avoiders often come from homes where conflict was a bad thing.
  • What if addressing the issue leads to a productive conversation?

Popular Topics On Married Life

  • You begin to develop trust and intimacy in the relationship.
  • The social butterfly finds social interactions second nature, and needs to expend little (or no) energy on figuring out these relationships.
  • A 2011 research study found that high conflict avoidance in a relationship will likely cause relationship dissatisfaction for women, but not necessarily for men.
  • While avoidance sometimes seems like the best way to deal with conflict, in the long run it ends up harming our intimacy.

Approach-avoidance conflict vs. fear of negative evaluation theories

  • By learning how to more effectively communicate your emotions and boundaries in a non-triggered state, you will likely feel more prepared to face conflict directly, rather than avoiding it.
  • As long as each application accesses the same resources and services in the same way, that system software — the operating system — can service almost any number of applications.
  • Although the fundamental roles of an operating system are ubiquitous, there are countless operating systems that serve a wide range of hardware and user needs.
  • Disagreeing with someone doesn’t necessarily mean “fighting.” Keep in mind that it’s not about blaming the other person or proving who’s right and wrong in a given situation.


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